My first suggestion is to see the movie "Match Point" by Woody Allen. You are definitely that boy.
You love someone you say "deeply" but money and comfort mean more to you than love. You live with someone whose family has taken you in and accepted you and you are not really being honest with your live in, but you are too scared of making your own way in the world and taking on adult responsibility.
Second, I hear that you don't feel capable of supporting yourself and that living on your own, without the support of your current g.f. would be too hard to handle. Does that sound like an adult male to you? Exactly.
So let me ask....what do you do? Are you capable of being emotionally and financially independent? Can you really take on the responsibility of a mother and daughter? That is a pretty big order.
Also, it sounds like the girl you love gave you a chance but that you weren't able to break with the other girl. She did right by refusing to see you. Who needs someone that ambivalent?
I think that even though you don't really want the one you have, you are afraid to go for what you really want. Honestly, that just cheats everyone: you, girl number one and girl number two as well.
I also wonder what the emotional health is of the girl you say you love if she has chosen abusive or unstable relationships. What makes you think it will be any different with you?
Okay, so what should you do?
First, for goodness sakes, start to be honest at least with yourself and stop living the lie you are living just for the convenience of a nice life style.
Talk to the girl you love and tell her the truth: you want to marry her and leave your current live in. See if she is open to that. If you don't approach her, you will probably always regret it. Second, be a gentleman to the girl you live with. She sounds like a good person and at least deserves your honesty.
Third, remember that 23 is not very old. The most important task at your age is to establish yourself as an independent and mature entity that can support himself as well as a potential life partner. It doesn't sound like you are quite there yet, does it?
At the very least, both of these young women deserve someone who can "man up" truthfully and openly and end the deceit of your present situation.
I hope I have given you an answer that will be helpful to you. Good luck and keep me posted.
You love someone you say "deeply" but money and comfort mean more to you than love. You live with someone whose family has taken you in and accepted you and you are not really being honest with your live in, but you are too scared of making your own way in the world and taking on adult responsibility.
Second, I hear that you don't feel capable of supporting yourself and that living on your own, without the support of your current g.f. would be too hard to handle. Does that sound like an adult male to you? Exactly.
So let me ask....what do you do? Are you capable of being emotionally and financially independent? Can you really take on the responsibility of a mother and daughter? That is a pretty big order.
Also, it sounds like the girl you love gave you a chance but that you weren't able to break with the other girl. She did right by refusing to see you. Who needs someone that ambivalent?
I think that even though you don't really want the one you have, you are afraid to go for what you really want. Honestly, that just cheats everyone: you, girl number one and girl number two as well.
I also wonder what the emotional health is of the girl you say you love if she has chosen abusive or unstable relationships. What makes you think it will be any different with you?
Okay, so what should you do?
First, for goodness sakes, start to be honest at least with yourself and stop living the lie you are living just for the convenience of a nice life style.
Talk to the girl you love and tell her the truth: you want to marry her and leave your current live in. See if she is open to that. If you don't approach her, you will probably always regret it. Second, be a gentleman to the girl you live with. She sounds like a good person and at least deserves your honesty.
Third, remember that 23 is not very old. The most important task at your age is to establish yourself as an independent and mature entity that can support himself as well as a potential life partner. It doesn't sound like you are quite there yet, does it?
At the very least, both of these young women deserve someone who can "man up" truthfully and openly and end the deceit of your present situation.
I hope I have given you an answer that will be helpful to you. Good luck and keep me posted.
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