I'm 20 years old in my second relationship. In my past I have struggled with over 50 shallow crushes. I would obsess over a guy and fantasize until reality set in and I realized it would not work.
The relationship I am in right now is the only time I have ever gotten to know a guy first before developing feelings for him.
"Jake" is everything I could want in a guy. He is incredibly loyal, genuine, trustworthy, understanding, considerate, and affectionate. This is his first relationship and he's still figuring out how to be a good b/f. We have very similar backgrounds and beliefs. I know this relationship can go somewhere far. We have amazingly open communication compared to other relationships.
However, it is becoming serious really quickly. We have been dating for over 3 months, 2 of those have been spent long distance with little communication because of his location. While we have been apart, I have been receiving a lot of unwanted attention from males because I am attractive and a swing dancer. I love to dance and did not go looking for other romantic involvements. I have dealt with all but one of these advancements.
One of these guys "Matt" is incredibly attractive and shares similar beliefs. He is a really genuine, caring person which contrasts the other shallow crushes of my past. And he has feelings for me. But I am in a relationship!
I will go back to school for one more year so I will be with Jake during that time. There is no way things could ever work out with Matt because of the distance unless I go to grad school near him. How can I even be entertaining these thoughts?
I know I am getting afraid of commitment with Jake even though I do really like him and I know this relationship is substantial. He is so trusting of me though, should I share my feelings towards Matt at the risk of hurting Jake?
I am nowhere ready to be married. I will be in grad school for 6 years after graduation. Jake will still have one more year at school. I am just not sure if I am ready to settle down for good without really playing the field. But I know if I were to go back into the field, I'd only want to be in a relationship again.
It's really nice to have the stability, but I feel so guilty about my attraction toward Matt.
Is it possible to maintain a friendship with Matt? I really don't know him well but I am intrigued by his personality. He represents all of those shallow past crushes that were unobtained.
I have a tendency to be flighty, and I want to make things work out with Jake because it is so good for both of us, but to be serious at 20 without thinking of marriage until at least 4 more years?
It scares me but I don't want to run away from a good thing only to regret it later.
This is so selfish of me. I can't get Matt out of my mind but I don't want to lead him on and hurt him also...
Perplexed
The relationship I am in right now is the only time I have ever gotten to know a guy first before developing feelings for him.
"Jake" is everything I could want in a guy. He is incredibly loyal, genuine, trustworthy, understanding, considerate, and affectionate. This is his first relationship and he's still figuring out how to be a good b/f. We have very similar backgrounds and beliefs. I know this relationship can go somewhere far. We have amazingly open communication compared to other relationships.
However, it is becoming serious really quickly. We have been dating for over 3 months, 2 of those have been spent long distance with little communication because of his location. While we have been apart, I have been receiving a lot of unwanted attention from males because I am attractive and a swing dancer. I love to dance and did not go looking for other romantic involvements. I have dealt with all but one of these advancements.
One of these guys "Matt" is incredibly attractive and shares similar beliefs. He is a really genuine, caring person which contrasts the other shallow crushes of my past. And he has feelings for me. But I am in a relationship!
I will go back to school for one more year so I will be with Jake during that time. There is no way things could ever work out with Matt because of the distance unless I go to grad school near him. How can I even be entertaining these thoughts?
I know I am getting afraid of commitment with Jake even though I do really like him and I know this relationship is substantial. He is so trusting of me though, should I share my feelings towards Matt at the risk of hurting Jake?
I am nowhere ready to be married. I will be in grad school for 6 years after graduation. Jake will still have one more year at school. I am just not sure if I am ready to settle down for good without really playing the field. But I know if I were to go back into the field, I'd only want to be in a relationship again.
It's really nice to have the stability, but I feel so guilty about my attraction toward Matt.
Is it possible to maintain a friendship with Matt? I really don't know him well but I am intrigued by his personality. He represents all of those shallow past crushes that were unobtained.
I have a tendency to be flighty, and I want to make things work out with Jake because it is so good for both of us, but to be serious at 20 without thinking of marriage until at least 4 more years?
It scares me but I don't want to run away from a good thing only to regret it later.
This is so selfish of me. I can't get Matt out of my mind but I don't want to lead him on and hurt him also...
Perplexed
Posts
No comments:
Post a Comment
Comment here